More Thoughts on Being Imitated February 23, 2007
Posted by Erin in : General Lessons , trackbackJoe,
I was thinking more about being imitated as a parent. And although I know I want our children to grow up to WANT to imitate us, right now we are in a stage where they imitate us naturally. Abby is almost three years old and in what developmental experts call the “parrot stage”. It means just what it sounds like. Just like a parrot, much of what she says and sees, she does. And Elijah is almost 10 months old, and reading up on his development for this month, it was noted that imitation begins at this stage. So right now, our children are not necessarily thinking about whether we are worthy to be imitated, but are naturally imitating much of what we do.
This got me thinking about seeing ourselves in our children. When we first got married, I remember reading about marriage being equated to holding a mirror up to yourself and seeing what you really looked like. We have certainly experienced that a lot! But with children, sometimes it is worse than a mirror! I am often seeing a little version of me walking around in Abby. Sometimes this is good and sometimes it is bad.
I enjoy it when I see her light up when you get home from practice and she says, “How was practice?” I know she has heard me ask you that many times and is imitating what seems to be the loving thing to do when you get home. That brings great joy to my heart. But then I see things that I would prefer not imitated. The other day she came into the kitchen and told me that Soldier (one of her stuffed animals) had been disobedient and needed a spanking. I know this is something she has learned from me. I wasn’t so concerned that she felt Soldier needed a spanking, because often that is what disobedience requires. But what concerned me was when I asked her if she had prayed with Soldier after the spanking and given him a hug and a kiss and told him she loved him. She told me she hadn’t and had to run out of the room to go do that. I was saddened that for her discipline was mostly focused on the spanking and not the restoration to God and her parent.
All this is to say that if we want to see weaknesses in our own life, we can simply watch our child in action. You can also look to see what bothers you in your child’s behavior. Are you constantly correcting your child for whining? Look to see if you are a negative person? Does your child throw tantrums when he/she doesn’t get what he/she wants? Look to see if you throw your own version of a tantrum when God does not ordain things the way you would like. I am not saying children always imitate what their parents do in every situation. Children are born sinful and much of what they do is simply innate. But it is a good practice to observe what they are imitating to see what you may be struggling with in your own life.
Looking to be a good example to imitate,
Erin
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